Dangerous Breasts!

Dateline: Sanford Florida

March 6, 2009

Last night at a Country and Western tavern in Central Florida the local police department saved a city of 100,000 from dangerous breasts!  These weren't young immature breasts either, but fully 18 years old.

Several irresponsible teenage girls were arrested for releasing these boobs, er breasts into the public.  Well, not really into the public, actually the breasts were let out into the interior of The Barn, a local nightclub that was at the time packed with reveling plainfolk, country style folks.

The public was never in any danger, though, because the Sanford Police Department had anticipated the nippular release in a brilliant bit of detecting that highlights their devotion and pointy-edged wisdom - there was a Girls Gone Wild taping going on inside. 

So, with the GGW ladies whipping it out onstage, and everyone hoot(er)ing, the stalwart officers in their plainclothes disguises peeled their eyes and erected an undetected teat-squad, watching the patrons to make sure no un-registered human milk-dipersal units were freed to poke out anyones eye or bop into anybodys body.

The perks, or perps rather, were evidently overcome by the noise (folks shouting "Show us your tits!"), the excitement, the mayhem in general, and their breasts just popped out, after they lifted their Barn-issued GGW pink T-shirts.

They were summarily rounded up, the girls, not the breasts, although, both really, and hauled off to the jail.  It was close, but thankfully the public at large was saved from having to view those nasty critters, those alien beasts, those horrific organs.  Those pink-tipped cuddly mammary glands that so represent the mammals on this planet.

The other customers in the Barn were then safe to return to their partying, drinking, and staring at the registered breasts that were deemed safe for them by the City, County, and local police authorities.  Presumably the GGW crew got their teatage, or footage rather, and wrapped it up later.